I was the “perfect child”–until that one time, in the late 70’s when I told my Mom; while standing in the grocery line; “her hair’s so long and pretty”. Then He turned around, neatly tried beard, mustache and all.

In the 80s after just learning to write I got bored driving to Disney w my dad. I wrote “Help I’ve been kidnapped” on a sheet of paper and put it under the mini blinds in the van. We spent hours on the side of the road with police.

Took the family to the Zoo. We were in the big bird cage and my two year old decided to pee in the creek.

I do my very best to embarrass my children preemptively. “Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you”. Things like singing songs, whistling and dancing in the store. Or “riding” the shopping cart across the lot.

My daughter told an African American lady in the grocery store that her hair was crazy!

A VERY condesending saleswoman found that she had to sell us some furniture @ a the store’s price (due to their error) & suddenly tried to be nice. My little guy said: “You talk snotty!” Altho’ mortified, I was secretly cheering him!

! My niece asked a lady why she was so fat? The lady had to be like 400lbs She politely said she ate too many donuts! Cool lady I work with has a lot of kids Who seldom see a “brown” person like me and the ask how I get brown? (Under 5) I tell most that I ate too much chocolate or drink too much coffee! They surprisingly believe me! I laugh

Most embarrassing moment with my kids: I am a cantor at a local church and this weekend I didn’t have anyone to help me with my kids while I sang so I tried letting my twin almost-3 year olds sit with me by themselves. One of them spent half of the service walking around in circles in the choir area jumping up and down the stairs. At one point I heard them arguing about whether or not “Mommy” was singing. At another point, the pacing one knocked over a microphone.


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